Belong. Behave. Believe. – by Mark Milkamp
When our Journey Group had the privilege of meeting with Diana Butler Bass, she spoke about three words that I find still resonating deeply within me. Belong. Behave. Believe. Three words upon which have major significance in terms of how we understand their specific order as it relates to the life of ministry in the church—and ultimately the idea of justice. The traditional—if not orthodox—understanding of these ideas is in fact the opposite: Believe, Behave, Belong. We stand amongst a long history upon which personal piety is stressed and preached. We want to make sure people believe our message up front. Many of us have stories from our personal journeys when we recall a time when we “accepted Jesus as our Lord and Savior.” We stood up amongst our community and church and claimed we believed. Then it seems, in my experience, that we are somehow ushered into a new world in the church, let in though another passageway. Slowly we are trained how to behave. Go to church. Give your money. Read your Bible. Do your “devotions.” Don’t do this. Do that. Look this way. Read this, not that. Don’t go there. Listen to this. Don’t watch that. There are countless other trained behaviors that seem to exist depending on your particular faith heritage. And then if we have a track record of behaving well we discover that somehow we are now “in.” We belong. It’s our group now, we have a say in things and ownership and significance in the church. Our job then becomes to instill the same model in others—first you believe, then we will show you how to behave, and then you will be in—you will belong.
Perhaps some of our theological feathers are being ruffled with such suggestions—I know mine were. Am I wrong? Is this not the tendency of the church in our culture, in our nation? Perhaps it is one of the reasons for its rapid decline. I believe it tends to be, and I believe as I grudgingly become more entwined with the narrative of God’s story it is not the model I discover. Was Moses asked to believe before that burning bush so long ago? Or was he first told that he belongs with this Yahweh, and then called to follow him—learning to behave? After accepting that he indeed belongs, he learns to behave—by the time we see him as a honed leader on Mt. Sinai, I think it is safe to say his belief is becoming solidified. How about the disciples? Were they asked to “accept Jesus as their personal Lord and Savior” at the beginning of their journey? Or are those only the confessions we see at the end of their journey with him? They are told that they belong and then asked to follow. When they follow they learn how to behave. When they learn how to behave their belief becomes clearer. So much so that it is not until later in the story in Matthew 16 when we see Peter claiming “You are the Christ, the son of the living God.”
Don’t get me wrong—I am not saying that belief and behavior are not important steps with discipleship. What I am saying however is that humanity—every square inch of it—yearns from its mystical core to belong. And it grieves me when we as the church place pre-requisites upon that longing – that need. Belonging is about justice. When we have the opportunity to tell the broken that they belong it is a sacred thing. It is perhaps the first step towards regenerating the Love of Christ that is regenerating us. For me—serving in the city—there is a whole host of communities that feel they have no place to belong. They have been categorized as a statistic, locked into a welfare system that keeps them there, and by and large denied access to the resources and opportunities that the multitudes have ample use of. But they are the image bearers of the God who made them with the same mystical deep urge to belong.
Three years ago when I met Crystal she was waiting for me in my office with bloodied bandages wrapped up both her forearms. She was in tears and trembling. She had gotten into a drunken fight the night before with her boyfriend when she lashed out on herself and tore the flesh off of her own arms. I do not remember all the words that were shared but what I do remember is a deep longing I discovered beyond her tears, beyond her frustration with society, and beyond her poverty. Somehow, though not of myself, I was able to tell her that she belongs. She belongs here at this place, at this cross, with this cup– with all her mess of a life in tow. She belongs. She belongs here amongst us and all our diversity. And slowly she caught the contagious fire of the love and grace surrounding her and she began to live it out herself—she behaved—not at the churches command—but at the will of the spirit and the moving of her heart. And today I cannot imagine the fabric of this place without her.
Belong. Behave. Believe. For justice’ sake.
Mark Milkamp is an inner city pastor serving an RCA church plant in a diverse under-resourced community in Wyoming MI. He is also a member of the Journey Group revolving around Social Justice though Western Seminary and the Reformed Church in America. Mark enjoys life in the city with his wife Susan and their two young boys.